It´s a farewell. A farewell to a life, a farewell to a fear, a farewell to mourning.
My granny who died in March 2014 has always loved her garden, it was a part of her. Now she is part of a bigger garden. The memory of her is the seed that I´m planting in her bed with this performance.
It´s almost autumn. I remove the last plants that are growing in this stone framed bed that has always reminded me of a grave somehow. That has always made me feel uncomfortable somehow. Afterwards I´m aerating the soil with her spade. I´m doing, what she did, so many times before me. I´m doing it while wearing one of her favourite garden dresses. They are vividly defining my memory of her.
I´m not planting any seeds then but I´m bedding myself in the earth, thinking of her and her bed in the earth. I´m joining her in spirit, I´m joining her sleep – with her old linen that I´ve filled with earth. The white sheets get dirty, they get transformed, they become part of the bed, of the garden, of nature.
It´s like a game a child would play but way too serious to be just a game as it deals with that very dreaded idea of death. We all live so we have to die at some time, we have to say farewell to our life, we have to say farewell to others. It´s hard. It´s heavy. But this is an approach to learn to say goodbye. I plant myself into the earth, I bed myself as a seed full of life, as a body in which my granny lives on, in my memories. I bury my fear and my sadness to grow hope. It´s a farewell, it´s a tribute and a salutation.